Jan 17, 2011

Wanted to but Can't

Human is just as complicated as the natural structure.
Sometimes things just can't be explain in sane ways.

It applies to me.
In fact, I never admit that I am simple.
Sometimes I don't even know myself.
Lost in me, if you want to term it.

When you have something, you would not appreciate its existence;
When you are at the verge of losing it, then you start to grab hold of it.

I do not deny the fact that at this point of time, I am feeling the same way.
However, it is not as simple as it seems.
No matter how happy am I to keep thing as it is now, I could not.
I am not the rightful one to do so.

Things changed without my realisation.
If you were to ask me if I am missing you, I was not going to say yes.
If you are to ask me if I am missing you, I am not going to say no.
I think I might be in love.
I don't even know why.

Perhaps it was the many First times we have been through, without you even knowing it.
For the first time, I kissed in a club
For the first time, A guy bought me stuffs without me even asking
For the first time, I went on an uneventful short vacation but feel good nevertheless for the times we spent
For the first time, I felt super loving for a guy whom drove all the way just to see me for an hour on 010111
For the first time, A guy piggybacked me just for fun
And
For the first time, I bought something for a guy and I feel satisfied to the max.

It was all too good to be true.
I wish things were not that complicated at the first place too.

All I want to say is that I am glad to have you in my life.
Please forgive me for my jealousy.
Maybe somewhere in your mind, you might have wished you have not questioned me further.

Forgive me for my selfishness.
All I want is a simple kind of love, a simple relationship and a simple way of living life.

7 comments:

  1. Hmm... it is good to know you are in love... for I've long forgotten how it feels...

    I wanted to but it just don't know how it feel. I must admit that I feel lust but not love.

    Just hope that when the time comes, everything will fall in naturally.

    Wish you all the best.

    ReplyDelete
  2. u kissed in a club? lol

    ReplyDelete
  3. @ Dennis Ong :
    Not as good as it ought to be. It should be ended and not even started at all.

    @ Henry Lee :
    That is not the main point though.

    ReplyDelete
  4. HitoMi,

    Being in love is the greatest feeling.

    Being infatuated is similar, the feelings the excitement are almost the same.

    This is why many, young and old are confused and often disapointed.

    I trust and pray you are a fortunate one.

    My wife is the love of my life!
    My best friend.
    My playmate.
    My completeness.

    She is a gift.

    We have grown together for two decades now!

    I wish you well!

    David

    ReplyDelete
  5. @ David :
    Sigh..if only I can finally know what is love.

    Thanks and glad to hear you have a super lovely wife :) It is rare but you are lucky to have one

    ReplyDelete
  6. well that depends on how you see it and how you want it to be.

    life is always about choices. there's no right or wrong. just what you want.

    Is been awhile since i log into blogspot... anyway Happy chinese new year!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. @ Dennis Ong :
    Human is greedy, there are so many things we want but we know we cant get all of them.

    Happy Chinese New Year! Hope you get alot of ang paos

    ReplyDelete

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